| Looks like im going to do everything myself |
[04 Feb 2008|10:53pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 lethargic |
] |
Maybe i could use some help,
but hell, if you want something done right, you got to do it yourself
Maybe life is up and down but my life's been what till now?
I crawled up your butt somehow
And that's when shit got turned around
I used to be alive, I'm so pathetic but now I get it, what's done is done
I know you, just leave it alone and don't regret it
But sometimes some things turn into dumb things
And that's when you put your foot down.
|
|
|
| i cant handle this shit |
[27 Jan 2008|11:48am] |
i have way too much responsibility in my weekly schedule at this point in time.
i dont know what my intentions are but all i know is i cant handle all these things going on.
i think i need to stop before it gets more complicated.
but than again i cant say i dont want it...
|
|
|
| Life Update |
[22 Jan 2008|11:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bouncy |
] |
haha so i havent been on this in like almost a year, its really ridiculous looking back at the things i posted in the past.
WOW.
So several years later, after alot of growing up, i think im ready to start this thing up again.
The whole internet addiction to making private thoughts and gossip public for everyone started off with this website so might as well bring it back to the o.g. ways.
CAL POLY is awesome and i love it, glad im finally where i belong.
I really like my major and ive been meeting some cool peeps.
Ive been working with my kids for more than a year now, and they have made me realize how old im getting.
I recently landed a second job at American Eagle which has its perks but just adds some more stress to my life in the end.
Point is i need both jobs so i can afford moving out this year which is my ultimate mission.
in the personal business:
2006-2007 was a year full of betrayal, deception, disappointments. Maybe not FULL of it but bad things sometimes seem to overshadow the good, even if it is as a much smaller scale.
At this point in time im way too busy to uphold a meaningful relationship.
I still am in love with her but i think i need some more growing up to do and independence before i attempt returning to commitment .
but in all, im Geemmanuhappy.
|
|
|
|
[19 Jul 2006|08:06am] |
4 months since my last update.
best four months of my life.
maybe someday i can relive what we had.
|
|
|
| Shane. |
[18 Jun 2006|04:33pm] |
|
is a mark ass trick.
|
|
|
| Paralyzed |
[22 Mar 2006|01:15am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sleepy |
] |
it feels ever so refreshing to be finally have someone.
someone to think about when i wake up.
someone to think about before i go to bed.
someone to have several spontaneous phone calls with through out the day.
somone to hold my hand while im driving.
someone to call me her Big Mac
someone to kiss my cheek even though its scruffy sometimes.
someone to hold when its cold.
someone to make me an important part of their life.
its been over 2 years since the last one,
so it still hasn't fully kicked in yet.
but im loving it so far,
and i hope ill love it for much longer
|
|
|
| I have a problem. |
[06 Feb 2006|10:17pm] |
I have an addiction.
to women.
i think its gonna be the undoing of me.
|
|
|
| nowhere really fucking fast |
[30 Jan 2006|09:56am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
sneezy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
nowhere fast |
] |
so the same thing happens over and over.
every time i show interest in somone or vice versa ,
there is always SOMETHING that fucks everything up and leaves me hurt or with a guilty consience.
everyone in any o fmy "cliques" always pairs up and im odd man out,
odd man that has to drive everyones drunk ass and gets to feel guilty about life.
|
|
|
| thats it. |
[10 Jan 2006|11:12pm] |
i am officially done doing things for people.
unless i see them start doing things for me, dont expect much out of me.
i am not a bus driver and i have priorities in my life too.
|
|
|
| rant. |
[28 Nov 2005|11:01pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 aggravated |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
bonnie taylor |
] |
im frustrated with everything around me.
i cant stand the materialism and fakeness i constantly see on the internet and at shows and with people i know.
im sick of me not even being able to grow a close relationship to anyone.
all my best friends have someone else they confide in, and talk to and shit
it seems like everyone is easily finding their counterpart
while im always stuck on the same person who doesnt seem to give a shit
and the other one i considered seems to be everywhere so i dont want part of that.
tmie goes by and i just keep everything inside and it feels like it will all eventually explode.
all i can hope for is to pass my classes.
and to get my fuckin band off the ground and start playing more often because music is the only way i can aliviate all this shit at least for a while.
i know noone will prbably read this but i just need to let it out in some form since i have noone to talk to about it.
oh another thing.
noone takes me seriously.
they think i am one big joke.
|
|
|
| cuando no? |
[22 Oct 2005|12:56pm] |
so when it thought i was actually doing things right,
and like nothing could go wrong,
things got way wierd.
and then i remembered how things always end up.
so congradulations, youve got the upper hand.
|
|
|
| wooooo |
[02 Oct 2005|01:12pm] |
|
now THAT was incredible.
and i only had to wait..2 months.
|
|
|
| somtimes, things just build up |
[18 Sep 2005|01:15am] |
im tired of the people around me complaining about how bad they have it.
when it comes down to it, they treat other people the same way they say they are treated.
sometimes i just dont know about my "friends".
maybe i just think too much and i see things the wrong way.
but i am undoubtedly uncomfortable with the way things are at this point in time.
|
|
|
| just dandy |
[01 Sep 2005|10:38am] |
so now good things literally run away from my reach.
well shit.
|
|
|
| bloodlust. |
[27 Jul 2005|01:06am] |
|
summer is finally getting good.
ive been able to get everything on my list.
im finally doing all the things i couldnt before and ill be able to do more soon since i turn 18 in a few weeks.
only one more thing left.
i will not fuck up this time.
|
|
|
| since rosie told me to |
[07 Jul 2005|10:08am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
porceain hearts and hammers for teeth |
] |
summer has been not so exciting but im making the best of it.
ive been working mostly or wtver and playing guitar and doing a lot of things i didnt have time for before because i had school
such as: spending time with ma lil bro,
watching all the movies i loved as a kid
going to a drive in movie theater!
collecting comic books
going to shows again
go to the beach
i try to hang out with different people and i kinda have.
but ive learned not to be dependant on others, because attachment leads to drama.
im not one to get attached anymore, but i think im about to do so again...
ahh..
now i cant get this song out of my head.
|
|
|
|
[24 May 2005|06:42pm] |
|
Shut your bitch ass up.
oh and so like i was trying to convince phat J that once u get a car youll be a pimp.
so here i have a graph of the rate at which i was pimpified.
|
|
|
| better recognize |
[10 May 2005|04:57pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
rageagainstthemachine |
] |
Your Taste in Music:
|
| 90's Hip Hop: High Influence | | Gangsta Rap: High Influence | | Hip Hop: High Influence | | 80's R&B: Low Influence | | 90's Alternative: Low Influence | | 90's Pop: Low Influence | | 90's Rock: Low Influence | | Adult Alternative: Low Influence | | Alternative Rock: Low Influence |
|
|
|
| Pucker up and kiss the asphalt now |
[21 Apr 2005|08:37pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
you know.. those splintered larynxes and bubbles in an IV |
] |
its all funny to me.
buttt.big weekend coming up.
hanging with the homies, probably gonna chill out more than last week cuz i dont feel like driving up to the mountains and getting lost in wierd cities.
cities with street lanes for horses!
i need to get a tan or something im kinda too white under my shirt and ya..damn
my momma got a new phone and its all fancy and she doesnt even need it. i think me and her should trade but we probbably wont. hot damn.
so ya!
i need 12 + 9.99 + service fee $'s
someone give it to me.
|
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
i_am_denial's journal